Admit, Accept, Forgive, Move On: Elvy G. Soltau

Admit, Accept, Forgive, Move On 

I have one of the most beautiful smiles in the world; i know that for a fact. When I  take pictures I look at in awe for the first few seconds, then I begin to think How is it that  I smile so bright while my heart is troubled? My mind is enslaved with fears? My bones are weak and my courage is fading? But my smile stand strong! And trust me that gives me energy to move on. 

Like everyone else, I'm still under construction I am not even quarter of a mile through to perfection. I still struggle with majority of things. Some of which include: procrastination, doubtfulness, selfishness and I have this invisible defense line around my heart and mind which prevents me from become emotionally attached to anyone; this my friends has caused many of the problems in my life. I know I am not the only one out there struggling and recovery seem so far-fetched at times. 

I have established four simple steps to recovery I am at step 2. They include: 

1. Admit- 

State your flaws openly. In order for you to admit your flaws you must first do some introspection. Yes, self examination is key! Look deep within and identify the problems. Ask questions like: Am I kind enough? Do I love enough? Am I patient enough? How could I have done things differently? Did I overreact? Did i hurt their feelings? Am I fair in my judgement? For this stage to be successful you must be extremely honest with yourself. 

2. Accept:

After you have admitted your flaws, please do not deny them.  It will worsen the situation; acceptance is key! Accept your flaws. Accept the fact that you're not perfect and there's also room for improvement. If you'll fail to accept them you will not move on to the next stage which in turn will affect your holistic development. Acceptance make the burden a little lighter and makes the next step easier.

3. Forgive:

"Forgiveness is not always easy. At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered, to forgive the one that inflicted it

. And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness"- Marrianne Williamson. Marrianne is right! There's indeed no peace without forgiveness. Forgiving one's self is on of the hardest task out there... Will it is hard for me. I always blame myself! Always. But I encourage myself to let it go ... Learn a lesson, make peace with your past and look for the future .. with brings me to the next stage. 

4. Move on: This is stage will be simple if you have successfully completed stages 1-3. If it moving on will be the hardest thing you've ever done! Hoping that you will complete stages 1-3... MOVE ON.

Go write a book! Go play so ball! Go open up your heart to someone! Go learn to dance! Go love again! Go and be free!  

And if history happens to repeat itself, remember: 

ADMIT ...... ACCEPT ......... FORGIVE ....... MOVE ON! =D 

There's No Self Made Man - Elvy G. Soltau

There's No Self Made Man 

Yes, I must apologize for the long abrupt break in my blog, but due to several factors, I was forced to take a break from blogging.  I hope everyone is in the best of health.  With the new mosquito borne disease on the rise, please ensure to exploit the necessary preventative measures.

I had a tremendous summer; though it was far from what I had in mind, I made sure to enjoy every moment. From volunteering at Effortville Primary School to hosting harvest, birthday parties and graduation, along with being the guest speaker at two events. Bless the name of the Lord for the wealth of experience that I have accumulated over the summer. I must hasten to tell you that I also lost 7lbs (Yay me).

I have learnt several lessons of over the summer holiday, but the one I would like to bring to you now is: THERE'S NO SELF MADE MAN.  Many of us are so egoistic and feel as though we were self-made. Let me hasten to dismiss that idea and quickly reinforce that each one needs one. We are interdependent; we rely on others for abstract and concrete things such as acceptance, affection, financial assistance, counseling, direction and companionship. 

No, I’m not implying that we should sit down and wait for people to hand stuff to us.  What I’m saying is, let us not walk with our tails in the air and our pride in our faces, and refuse the assistance of others. I learnt in the summer that there's no crime in asking for help. I am the kind of person who would be hungry right beside you and you wouldn’t know, because I told myself that everyone has their own struggles to face and I didn’t want to burden them with mine.... Until I realized that I can’t make it on my own. I need my friends to push me when I get lazy; I need them to cheer me on when I enter a competition.  I need them to force me to exercise when I feel like slacking off.  I need my friends to remind me of my strengths when I'm enslaved by my weaknesses.  I need the moral support from church family, and the financial support and positive reinforcement from my family.  I need the critics to keep me on the right track ... I need the trials to keep me humble, but most importantly, I need God to keep me sane....

I must remind you that it still takes a village to raise a child..... There's no self-made man.

Shawn Wilson- Guest Writer: 6 Cheap Ways To Be Broke And Happy

Six (6) Cheap Ways To Be Broke And Happy

"Happiness is a state of mind; not a state of possession" -Unknown

I'm broke as hell. There's no money in my bank account, and the assets I have value a couple thousand. Other than that I have nothing on a church mouse.

My poverty, however, hasn't got the best of me. I'm not stressed out ..., and I’m fairly happy. Well ... sort of.

Reason being, I've learnt the Buddhist art of "no attachment", and how to live within my means. (Hard lessons I learnt while I was in college.)

Here are some other things I’ve learnt.

#1. That money doesn't buy (much) happiness...

...And the "little" that it buys doesn't last.

Studies show that after earning a certain amount of money per year, the rush one feels about money disappears.

Remember how you were excited when you got your first bicycle/...? And remember how quickly the excitement went? It's the same with money.

Along with "stuffs" here's what money can buy.

#2. Big experiences

But you don't need money to have quality experiences.

Watching a beautiful sunset is a quality experience. Going to the river with your friends is a quality experience. Getting a good night's sleep is a quality experience. Having a good laugh is a quality experience.... And the list could go on and on.

I know you’d rather go to Dubai and Paris, and I would too..., but, umm, unless you can buy such an experience, forget it. (You probably wouldn’t buy it if you could, anyway.)

#3. If you can't afford “it”, don’t buy “it”

You can't afford it if you can’t buy more than one of it. At least, that’s my principle.

I can afford something only when I can buy two or three of that thing, and still have enough money left over.

#4. Don't try to keep up with the “Joneses”...

...Because you can't. You're broke. The “Joneses” are wealthy. That's why the grass is so green on their lawn. But don’t forget that that's why their water bill is so high. And you can't afford their water bill, much less their light bill.

Do this instead. Work on your lawn. Now.

Meaning work on yourself: Be healthy. Stay healthy. Get smarter; and smarter. Think big –and different –and hard.

Read More Here: 

https://www.linkedin.com/today/post/article/20140913065641-335942314-6-cheap-ways-to-be-broke-and-happy

Written by: Shawn Wilson 

Research Assistant at Biblical Manuscript Research Center